Tonight was another rough night. As I went to the bathroom, I had about 5 or 6 blood clots come out, each the size of a pinky finger (or slightly bigger) in both width and length. Being another scary and new symptom, it upset me quite a bit. I started crying and couldn’t stop. Greg heard me so he and Adrianna came upstairs. Adrianna was very concerned. She kept asking me (through the door) “Are you okay, Mommy? Why are you crying? Are you crying Mommy?”
Not knowing what I could really tell her, I finally told her that Mommy wasn’t feeling good. So then she started asking if I had an owie or a tummyache?
When I finally left the bathroom, I walked straight into Greg’s arms and cried some more as he held me. Sweet Adrianna hugged my legs and we all three stood there holding each other.
After a bit, we came downstairs so I could call the doctor. Adrianna picked up her teddy bear and told me “Teddy Bear kiss your owie, Mommy” and she put his nose against my leg and made a kissy, smacking sound. My sweet, sweet girl. Such a tender heart. She really did help my sorrow.
The doctor on call said that the size of the clots are okay but to come in to the doctor tomorrow since I am still having bleeding. I sure hope this little baby is still hanging in there. And I sure wish the bleeding could stop so I could have less stress and worry. I feel bad for Adrianna; I just lay around the house taking it easy for the baby’s sake, but she doesn’t understand that. She only sees that Mommy isn’t as much fun as she used to be. At least we can still read books and play quiet games on the couch together, but she is always asking me to play more active games with her.