Democrats vs Republicans

You have probably all seen this email forward, but I still think it is pretty funny (and oh so appropriate) for this coming election.
Democrats vs Republicans

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.”

She rolled her eyes an said, “you must be a Republican”.

“I am, how did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly you’ve not been much help to me.”

The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Democrat.”

“I am,” replied the balloonist, “how’d you know?”

“Well”, said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You’ve risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it’s my fault.”

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3 Responses

  1. Richard says:

    Everything he said about her was true – except they are both Republicans, she just said what she needed to say to distance herself from another Republican she felt was acting like a jerk.

    His GPS (Gullible Person Statistics) generator is what the Republicans have used for years to sound like they know what they are talking about (when really they don’t) and to make up any statistics they need to justify whatever it is they have already decided on.

    The reason we know this is because when the facts are checked, the coordinates he gave locate them 13.9 miles (22.4 km) WNW of Menard, TX which is at an altitude of 2099 ft. and the closest water is in San Angelo, TX over 60 miles away.

    By the way, the reason he was in a boat was, he had been the Captain of a large ship and the crew and passengers had mutinied and set him adrift for lying to them about where he was taking them, torturing them and eavesdropping on their private conversations. 😉

  2. Amber says:

    Wow – All I have to say is, “Touché!” LOL. 🙂

  3. aaazzz111 says:

    Those coordinates are in the Texas desert.
    Shows you where the lost Republican ship is stranded.

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